Health and happiness at every size: Expert Tips on raising healthy kids from a nutrition expert

Health and happiness at every size: Expert Tips on raising healthy kids from a nutrition expert

Kathleen Zelman, MPH, RDN

Based on our Nutrition4Kids podcast with Jill Castle, MS, RDN.


Raising healthy kids isn't just about weight. It's about how their bodies feel, move, and grow. In this article, based on the dietitian and author Jill Castle's comments, you'll learn how to support your child's health without focusing only on weight. We'll cover how to create healthy routines, why body image matters, and what parents can do to help kids thrive.

Key Takeaways

  1. Establish Regular Meal Times: Consistent schedules help regulate appetite and reduce unnecessary snacking. Parents have power, your example matters more than you think.
  2. Focus on Healthy Habits: Prioritize routines around sleep, activity, and meals over weight concerns.
  3. Foster a Positive Body Image: Encourage self-love and model healthy behaviors to support emotional well-being.
  4. Diets don't work for kids – build healthy routines instead.
  5. Start early – young kids, even infants, learn habits that last for life.

Feeding kids can be hard. Even health professionals can feel overwhelmed. Many parents worry about their children's eating habits—especially in a world full of excess sugar and processed foods. In fact, research shows:

  • 59% of parents worry about unhealthy eating habits
  • 54% stress over their child's lack of exercise
  • 40% are concerned about mental health

Jill's newest book, Kids Thrive at Every Size, offers a fresh way to think about raising healthy kids. Her approach looks at the whole child—not just the number on a scale.

Focus on Routines and Healthy Habits

Children thrive on routine, especially when it comes to meals and snacks. Establishing regular eating times helps regulate appetite and reduces constant snacking. Kids do best when they know what to expect.

  • Toddlers and Preschoolers: Offer meals and snacks every 2–3 hours.
  • Older Children and Teens: Space meals and snacks every 3–4 hour.

Incorporate protein and fiber into meals to promote fullness and reduce the urge to snack between meals.

More Fruits and Vegetables

Most kids don't get enough fruits and vegetables—usually just 2–3 servings a day and they should get five servings. Encourage more fruits and vegetables by making them readily available and pairing them with dips, cheese or yogurt.

Jill reminds us that no child gains too much weight from eating too many fruits and veggies. They're packed with nutrients and help kids feel full in a healthy way.

Managing Sweets and Treats

Completely banning sweets can make them more appealing to children. Instead, introduce them in a structured and predictable manner.

  • Set Specific Days: Designate certain days for treats, like Friday ice cream nights.
  • Avoid Over-Control: Parents are in charge but need to allow children to enjoy their treats without excessive restrictions.

This approach helps children develop a healthy relationship with food and reduces the allure of forbidden items. For example, in her own home, Jill didn't allow sweets during the school week. But every Friday after school, they went out for ice cream.

What About Drinks?

When it comes to fluids, Jill's basic rule is:

  • Milk or a fortified (with calcium and high in protein) non-dairy drink at meals
  • Water the rest of the day

Limit sugary drinks like soda, energy drinks, and sweet coffee drinks. If kids drink 100% juice, keep it to about one cup a day for older kids.

Eight Pillars of Wellness

Beyond diet, other lifestyle factors play a crucial role in a child's well-being. Jill says the best way to support your child's health is to focus on daily habits and the eight key wellness pillars:

1. Family Culture and Self-Love

Kids thrive in families where health is about balance, love, and support. How you talk about food and bodies can deeply impact your child's self-esteem and motivation.

2. Sleep: Getting enough rest supports growth, learning, and mood. Help your child go to bed and wake up at the same time each day.

3. Movement: Exercise doesn't have to mean sports. Daily activity—walking, dancing, playing—is what matters most. Let kids choose fun ways to move, like biking, dancing, or playing outside.

4. Feeding: This is about how parents and children interact at mealtimes. Positive feeding helps kids learn to enjoy a variety of foods without pressure or shame.

5. Eating Habits: Children's habits form early. Teach them to listen to their hunger and fullness.

6. Food Choices: Instead of labeling foods as "good" or "bad," focus on building a balanced, nutrient-rich diet. Offer meals that have fruits, vegetables, protein, and whole grains.

7. Screen Time: Too much screen time can affect sleep, physical activity, and mental health. Set limits and encourage unplugged time.

8. Self-Love: This is one of the most important pillars. Kids who feel good about themselves are more likely to take care of their bodies. Sadly, many kids with larger bodies face teasing, bullying, and even unfair treatment from adults.

Promoting Positive Body Image

Children often face societal pressures regarding body image. Over 90% of children who carry extra weight report being bullied or treated differently. This includes teasing from peers, judgment from adults—even healthcare providers.

That's why kindness, support, and awareness are so important. When we help children feel loved and accepted, we give them the confidence to grow into their healthiest selves.

Parents can counteract this by:

  • Using Positive Language: Avoid negative comments about weight or appearance.
  • Modeling Healthy Behaviors: Demonstrate balanced eating and regular activity.
  • Supporting Emotional Well-Being: Encourage open discussions about feelings and self-worth.

By creating an environment that prioritizes health over appearance, children can develop a more positive relationship with their bodies. Health isn't about size – it's about how well the body works.

Avoid Diets, Build Confidence

Many parents worry about their child's size, but diets can harm kids. Restrictive eating can lead to cravings, stress, and negative thoughts about food. Instead of putting kids on a strict diet (which often doesn't work and can feel like punishment), help them build habits that last a lifetime.

Here's what works better:

  • Talk Positively About Bodies: Say kind things about your own body and your child's.
  • Avoid Labeling Foods as "Bad": Teach that all foods can fit in a healthy diet.
  • Let Kids Learn Hunger Cues: Encourage them to stop eating when full—even if there's food left.

Parents can have a great deal of influence on their child's health by being a good role model, making it fun to be active and eat healthy as a family and by keeping the routine for meals, snacks and sleep.

What About Weight Loss Medications?

Some new medicines are now approved for teens with serious health concerns, like diabetes or very high blood pressure. But these medications are not for every child, and they're still being studied for long-term safety. If medication is needed, it should always be combined with healthy habits—and guided by a medical team.

Doctors will usually suggest healthy lifestyle changes first, like better food, more movement, and good sleep. These changes can work well on their own.

Start Healthy Habits Early

Kids learn best when they're young. Habits like eating breakfast, getting enough sleep, and being active become normal when started early.

As kids grow, it's harder to change habits. That's why starting early is one of the best ways to help your child be healthy, happy, and confident.

Final Thoughts

Raising healthy kids isn't about strict rules, perfect meals, or tiny bodies. It's about habits, structure, love, and acceptance. Jill Castle's expert advice shows us that health can—and should—come in every size.

With thoughtfulness, families can build a balanced approach to feeding, movement, and mental wellness that helps kids feel strong, happy, and confident—just as they are.

Resources:

Castle, Jill. Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness, August 13, 2024

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O'Connor EA, Evans CV, Henninger M, et al. Interventions for weight management in children and adolescents: updated evidence report and systematic review for the US preventive services task force. JAMA. 2024;332(3):233-248.

American Heart Association. "Healthy eating behaviors in childhood may reduce the risk of adult obesity and heart disease." https://www.heart.org/en/healthy-living/healthy-eating/eat-smart/nutrition-basics/dietary-recommendations-for-healthy-children

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Zahran, S., Cliff, D.P., Antczak, D. et al. Optimal levels of sleep, sedentary behaviour, and physical activity needed to support cognitive function in children of the early years. BMC Pediatr 24, 735 (2024).

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